I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
