Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
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