He asked to "fluff my boner.."
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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