Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
