this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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