I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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