We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
