I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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