after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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