So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
