the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
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