I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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