Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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