Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
