At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize