i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
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He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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