Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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