How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
