There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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