I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Randomize
