the new term for farting is butt boxing.
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
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