i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
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