Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Randomize
