i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize