In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
