I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
im about as happy as oj after his trial
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize