That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize