i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize
