need another drink. this is the easiest way
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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