I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Randomize
