69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize