The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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