there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
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