Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Randomize
