And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
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He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
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She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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