piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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