please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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