Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
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