awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
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