Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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