dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
