He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
