id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
