I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
