This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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