I just cut my nipple shaving
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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