She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Sorry about my life...
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
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