he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
he just fucked me for my cheese.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
