You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
