She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
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It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
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So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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